DCDanceBlog

i had an interesting choreography session the other day. of course it was one of those days when it took me forever to get started–oh, right, they’re all like that. well, anyway, i was rolling along, not really thrilled w/ what i was doing, but making headway nonetheless. it’s funny how revelatory it is that making art is work. i think it’s b/c i used to only create when i felt downright inspired, which is when it really doesn’t feel like work. putting time in when i’m not inspired isn’t necessarily a struggle, but it takes more confidence, more faith that something will come with time.

so i was working away, trying to find something interesting to say. and i guess some part of me was still aiming for that feeling of electricity, of inspiration, b/c i kept trying to get the same kind of big, fluid movement going that’s what i do when i’m really juiced up and excited. but it wasn’t coming–and what i did come up with felt forced. finally, somewhere in there, i remembered a quote by merce cunningham (him again!), something about how he values every single movement, how nothing, not even the plie that precedes a jump, is a throwaway or seen as unimportant. there’s something very meditative and zen-like about that that really appeals to me, and it came back to me in the studio.

and so somehow i shifted my mindset, and started to slow down. stopped trying so hard, and started just being right there, looking at what i was doing then, not rushing to be somewhere else more exciting. and i liked it! the stuff i came up with wasn’t necessarily so interesting to anyone else, but it interested me, and it was definitely different from what i normally do. hell, i’m sick of what i normally do.

it’s always so so great, to discover another layer beneath the one that you thought was the bottom.